It’s been way too long with this back pain. After some much needed tough love from my family, I am attacking this new year with new doctors. The ones I am with just aren’t working.
I have now made a new doctor appointment with my primary care physician to see who he can recommend. I have also made appointments with the pain clinic at UCSF and the spine center at UCSF.
I really don’t like the idea of going to a pain clinic. It makes me feel like I have failed. I shouldn’t have to be going to a pain clinic — I feel like I should be better by now. Yet, I am not. It also makes me worried that they are going to prescribe a bunch of pills that simply mask the pain and that I won’t actually get any better. Another big concern of mine is that the masking of the pain will actually cause more damage. I injure myself so easily. Sometimes I don’t know how much until the next day when a simple pain, or a non-felt pain materializes the next day into a full-blown problem.
But, I will try this pain clinic because what do I have to lose? I know, that’s what I said about the physical therapist and I am a million times worse now because of them. Oh, how I wish I had never gone to that physical therapist. Sometimes, well a lot actually, it keeps me up at night thinking about how that one physical therapy visit changed my entire life.